It wasn't awkward, because I didn't make it awkward; I uncrossed my perpetually crossed arms and talked comfortably with him for the rest of the ride.And—thank you, fate—when we happened to get off at the same stop, he asked for my number. I'd hypothesize that 80% of missed connections are missed because someone was just relying on catching the other person's eye.
He was a graphic designer based in NYC with more than 40,000 pins, and I prejudged from those pins that he was cool, and straight, and felt a little boost from knowing he picked up on what I was pinning. Consistent and generous, but still selective repins started to follow a pattern, and I felt like I was really getting to know him.
I started pinning with anticipation, knowing what he'd like.
Meanwhile, thanks to my status as a supremely awkward individual, my "flirting" reads more like uncomfortable gawking than coquettish glancing."You have to bump it up and start a conversation," NYC "dateologist" Tracey Steinberg informed me when I explained that I actually couldn't find love in a hopeless place."So, ," I said pseudo-casually, "If, say, one of our readers is shy, what advice would you have?
""If you want to meet someone, you don't have the luxury of being shy," she responded. When I called on Steinberg, I was hoping that she would give me her secrets to expert eye-flirting and I'd be batting my eyelashes to a date in no time.
What I quickly learned from our conversation, however, is that just wasn't going to fly.
Pitfalls be damned, Steinberg gave me the following guidelines to all but guarantee that I had a date by the time I emerged from my evening commute: Start the conversation."I would start by asking him a question about anything in your environment—anything you see, hear, taste, touch, or smell," suggest Steinberg.
And certainly those I follow, who I gathered mostly for home and style inspiration and possibly a little dose of DIY ambition, skew almost entirely female.
I went to Pinterest to find mommies with perfectly decorated living rooms and creative taste in costume jewelry, so a guy seemed like pure novelty.
On the way to work, my train was laughably crowded—so much so that we were at a standstill at a Brooklyn station as the doors cartoonishly opened and closed for five minutes straight.